Not everyone celebrates Christmas but most of them have probably paid their cell phone bills already

Oh, you're Jewish? I'm sorry

I was talking to a fellow volunteer last week and I asked her if she was ready for Christmas. Then she said, No, I still have to get a few Hannukah gifts. And I was like I'm sorry. And then I had to clarify exactly why I was sorry. So I quickly explained that I wasn't sorry she was Jewish but I was sorry that I assumed she celebrated Christmas. Oy.


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Hello this is the United States calling

I haven't paid my cell phone bill yet because I figured if the world is ending, why bother. I'd like to call Japan and Sri Lanka and run up the bill, too. But I don't know anyone in either place so that ends that. Plus, if the world really doesn't end I'll have a huge phone bill and Bill will be like, Why did you call Japan and Sri Lanka? And I really don't want to answer for my phone calls. Somehow I think, because I felt like it wouldn't go over very well.