Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Late to the party

I don't watch The Walking Dead. I don't follow Game of Thrones.

There I said it. For those of you who are new here, feel free to leave while looking disdainfully at me. I don't mind. I've mentioned a time or two, or six that I don't do trendy things. This extends to popular TV shows. I know this makes me sound like a snob but really it's more that I'm a bit picky about what TV shows I let myself get sucked into. I can be a hard sell.

And then there are times I'm (very) late to the viewing party. Whatever, at least I get there. Case in point, The Big Bang Theory. I know, it's been on for like 10 years now. What can I say? So I've been catching the reruns here and there and I recently started binge-watching it one season at a time.

I have done the palm-to-the-forehead smack several times for waiting so long to get into this show.

This show amuses me to no end, even though they reference a lot of brainy/techie things that I have no clue about and I end up feeling as lost as Penny. But can I just say, I love Sheldon. The way he speaks fluent sarcasm makes me so happy.

I also love their nerdy Science Fiction references. I could totally sit and hang out and eat Chinese food with them while wearing my new Avengers t-shirt. Until they start talking Quantum Physics and then I go across the hall and hang out with Penny.

Saturday, April 25, 2015

Signs to make you laugh

It's a cool, rainy day here today and I have a case of the lazies so I'm just going to post some funny signs I came across on the Internet. Hope you have a good laugh or two.

I think these people mean business. Still, I would stick around to see all of this regardless of the danger.

The "and shit" really drives the point home.

Talk about a liquid lunch. And now we know why the Sales Department didn't come back to the office.

Would you like that in a cup or a bowl?

This sign made me laugh a little too hard. The only thing funnier would be to see that one person make a beeline off-course to find a bush.

Talk about motivation.

Thursday, April 23, 2015

My birthday party fictional character guest list

It's my birthday and I was thinking about the birthday parties I had when I was much younger. And then I started to think about who I would invite if I had a party now. So I compiled a list of fictional characters I would invite to my birthday party. It's a whimsical mix of different personalities and different backgrounds. But all are from TV shows/movies and books that I love(d). Each would lend their own unique brand of something to make this party one for the ages.

I told Bill about this and he asked if he was on the guest list. I explained that he's not a fictional character and also he didn't need to be on the list because he should be there by default. Then he looked at me with that smirk that says You are so full of shit. Am not.

So here's my Birthday Party Fictional Character Guest List:

Lorelei Gilmore from Gilmore Girls - What's not to love about her? She's fun and funny and it would be like having your very best girlfriend there.

Raylan Givens from Justified - He's a badass with a cool hat. And could also help out when the inevitable fight breaks out.

Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory - He's sarcastic and amusing. I would initiate a game of musical chairs just to watch him freak out.

Ichabod Crane from Sleepy Hollow - He would be fun to teach current party activities to and to learn past party rituals from. 

Gomez Addams from The Addams Family - He's creepy but entertaining in a menacing and loveable way.

Holly Golightly from Breakfast At Tiffany's -She's the coolest party girl. And then after partying all night we could all go have a pastry in front of the Tiffany's windows.

Minions from Despicable Me 1 & 2 - This is an obvious choice.

Worf from Star Trek The Next Generation & Deep Space 9 - Well, what party wouldn't be complete without an alien? Besides Klingons are my fave ST villains.

Lois Lane from Superman -I would invite her to maybe talk shop since I was once a reporter and also hopefully the Man of Steel might make an appearance, too.

Bumblebee from Transformers - He could be the designated driver and DJ. It's a 2-for-1 with the coolest car ever.

Stephanie Plum from Janet Evanovich's Plum book series - She's from New Jersey. That's all the explanation needed. And if you've read the series, you know that something is bound to get blown up at the party.

Snoopy and the Peanuts Gang -Yes, because every party needs comic strip characters.

Dr. Teeth & The Electric Mayhem from The Muppet Show - I love Animal and I would let them sing Happy Birthday to me.

Lestat from The Vampire Chronicles - I would have to make sure there was some blood on tap for him. Who knows, he might hit it off with Gomez. Then again, probably not. One thing's for certain, he'd be the most well-dressed person in attendance.

There's so many others to add to this list and if I put them all down this post would be enormous, so I'll stop here. These are just the ones that immediately came to mind. If I break it down my list is comprised of:

4 women
4 men
1 alien
1 vampire
1 Transformer
Animated characters
Comic strip characters

Now that's a party.

Monday, April 20, 2015

A weird post about pills, teeth and odd sentimentalities

I was cutting a pill in half on my nightstand one evening and one half stayed on the table and the other flew into my open drawer.

And why was the drawer open?

Because that's where I keep the knife.

And why do I keep a knife in my night table drawer?

Well, first of all, it's only a butter knife. I just thought I would clarify that before anyone thought otherwise and started watching the evening news for reports about a homicidal blogger. And no, I don't get cravings for buttered toast in the middle of the night. But I needed it for a similar reason when I was going off some meds a while back and had to start taking half doses. I just never returned it to the kitchen cutlery drawer. I'm lazy like that. And also forgetful, which explains that Payless coupon I came across from 2007. Besides one never knows when one might need a knife. They come in quite handy when you need a screwdriver but don't have one around.

So anyway, while searching for that half piece among all my jewelry, assorted papers, and other knick-knacks (hello Batman action figure), I found several loose teeth. I know, disturbing. Each time I saw a small piece of white I fished it out only to find it was a tooth.

At first there was disappointment. Where the hell is that damn pill half? Then, confusion. Why are there loose teeth in here?

Weird. This whole post is weird.

Anyway, I'm pretty sure the teeth belonged to Chris and fell out of a tissue they were in.

Why are his teeth in a tissue in my drawer?

Because I keep all the baby teeth he's lost. I'm oddly sentimental like that. Maybe I'm just plain odd. The husband says that's not only an obvious statement but an understatement.

In case you're wondering, I did finally find that stupid pill half. I now cut my pills with the drawer closed. The knife still remains in the drawer. The teeth are all in an enclosed zip-lock baggie. I cannot promise that this will be the last weird post.

Saturday, April 18, 2015

When the movie is better than the book

Movies based on books is so hit or miss. Sometimes an author's work makes it to the big screen and is a wild success. Other times our beloved books are huge disappointments in theaters.

But what about the opposite? What about when the movie is better than the book? It happens. I might be in the minority when it comes to this but I have had it happen. I'll give you an example, but remember these are just my opinions so don't shoot the messenger, 'kay? Also, for those who have never seen these movies or read these books there are spoilers below so look away!


I like the movie, Under The Tuscan Sun.  You know the one where Diane Lane's character goes through a bitter divorce and she takes a trip to Tuscany and impulsively buys a villa? She also cooks up these fantastically delicious looking meals that make me wish for my own personal Italian chef.

Anyway, as I was saying, I really enjoyed this movie so I was happy to find the book in my local library. It was a major bummer and I returned it after only making it halfway through the book. It was Nothing like the movie. In the book, Frances is happily married with kids and she and her husband buy the Italian villa together and spend time remodeling it. For those with wanderlust and a love of all things Italy this book is for you. I'm sorry to say I just wanted to revisit the characters and romance from the movie.

I do wonder - if I had read the book first and then seen the movie, would I have been equally as disappointed? Or pleasantly surprised? Or planning a trip to Italy? Olive Garden?

I just finished reading another book after having seen the movie first (and absolutely loving it!). This time I actually finished the entire book which means I wasn't completely discouraged when it ended up being different from the movie.

The book/movie I'm referring to is That Night written by Alice McDermott. The movie starred Juliette Lewis (Audrey in Christmas Vacation) and C. Thomas Howell (Ponyboy in The Outsiders).

The book itself was well-written and I might have enjoyed it more if I had read it first. But once again, I wanted to spend time with the characters from the movie. In this instance the movie kept true to some of the book but not enough for me. I guess Hollywood took some liberties. Not that I'm complaining.

By contrast, I've been reading the James Bond novels. I have seen all the movies, numerous times and I can honestly say the books are just as entertaining. Sure the movies are a feast for the eyes what with all the scenery and non-stop action but the books are exciting in their own right.

In the end, I guess sometimes an author's work is adapted and Hollywood hits it out of the park further than they initially intended. And sometimes you have a quirky fan like me.

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Oh look, another joke about diabetes and candy

This is a somewhat serious post about diabetes. Non-d peeps, you're excused if you want to leave and maybe go watch some Family Feud. I hear Steve Harvey's 'got a good one for ya today'.


Again with the stereo-type. You would think that in this day and age of vast information at our disposal that this would be a non-issue. But once again I come across a post on some social media site where someone makes a joke about diabetes and candy.

Then I weigh my options. Do I let it go? Do I (gently) respond? I usually take every opportunity to educate the un-informed masses about this myth but sometimes I feel like the Diabetes Police.

Sometimes someone comments about "Not having a sense of humor." Hmmm, let's see, holding my son's hand through a scary low blood sugar or watching him prick his finger for the 4th time in 2 hours as he battles high blood sugar is not my idea of funny. A joke that starts with, "A naked blond walks into a bar with a poodle under one arm and a two-foot salami under the other..."is funny.

You wouldn't make jokes about cancer. Hey I'm about to go lay out in the sun, guess I'm getting cancer, ha ha :). No, because that would be cruel and insensitive. Yet that statement has more truth to it based on medical and scientific evidence. Sun and exposure to ultra-violet rays can cause cancer.

But eating candy or sugary foods DOES NOT cause diabetes. That's a fact. So I'm not sure why diabetes continues to be the punchline to all the sugar-based jokes.

Diabetes is not a joke. Making fun of a disease, any disease, that people suffer from is not funny.

I actually do have a sense of humor. Anyone who knows me or reads this blog knows this. I love jokes, pranks, slapstick comedy, and 80's movies with terrific one-liners.

In the end, I did reply to the original comment. I simply stated that eating candy doesn't cause diabetes. I even kept it light by referring to myself as a killjoy to the ha-ha. So far there's been no replies to mine.

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

How I do happy

I modified our ketchup bottle because Heinz asked me to. And also because I'm childish and immature. But seriously, their bottle specifically asked How do you Happy? So I replied. With a marker. This is the result:

I'll show you mine if you show me yours.

Now I'm waiting until the other family members realize my handiwork. I'm pretty sure my son will find this hilarious. Then again, he's 11 so that goes without saying.

So Ketchup Company, you said Show us your Heinz. Here it is. Now, your turn. Also, I'm just kidding. I have no interest in your butts. I could use more ketchup though.

Monday, April 13, 2015

Road signs and their concerns and questions

Is it me or does something look different around here? Oh yeah, I changed the background color, some fonts and made a few other modifications. Call it Spring Cleaning. Or boredom. Now on to today's post. Yes, another blog entry so close to the last one. It's like the old days when I actually had more than 4 posts in a month. I'm almost giddy with excitement over this. Almost.

A week ago we went to Mt. Charleston for the day. Chris was on Spring Break so we took advantage of the beautiful day. It was also about 20 degrees cooler, too. We even saw patches of snow and Chris was able to make a sloppy snowball and throw it at his dad. That made his day. The snow playing, not the snowball throwing. Anyway, the views were amazing and the air was clear.

While driving around I saw some signs that made me laugh and so I had Bill pull over so I could take a picture of one. I'm not sure what to make of this.

I'm more concerned with this sign.

Who's concerned? And why? I saw no water around to be concerned about. Unless they mean the water being supplied to the people who live here. But that would be more of a plumbing issue I think. Then again, I don't live here so it doesn't really concern me.

There was also a sign that said one mile with an arrow and a question mark. I couldn't get a picture of that sign without making Bill pull over precariously close to the edge of a 20 ft drop but it made me laugh nonetheless. Here's a crude reproduction I drew but you get the general idea.

I mean if they don't know what's up ahead then by all means let's just drive along and be surprised. It'll be an adventure!

We plan on visiting there again (the mountain, not the sign), maybe when there's more snow for Chris to play in. Hopefully the questions and concerns are diminished by then.

Saturday, April 11, 2015

The fries from McDonald's song

I was eating some fries on the way home from picking up some McDonald's for dinner because we're into healthy eating and yes I am being sarcastic. Anyway, I started eating some of the fries out of the bag.


Because that's what you do when you have just-made, hot fries from McDonald's. And so I spontaneously made up a little song and it went something like this:

Eating fries out of the bag,
Because that's what you do
when you get fries from McDonald's.

I thought it was cute.  And so did Bill. He especially liked the "Because that's what you do" part. I'm not writing my Grammy Award winning speech yet but you have to admit, it is a little catchy.

But it only works with McDonald's fries. Burger King fries just aren't as good.

Friday, April 3, 2015

Confusing and weird job hunting communications

I'm still job hunting. And I still come across some weirdness when it comes to how companies communicate with prospective applicants.

Here's a recent example:

I applied to a job ad. I got a confirmation email that my application was received. So far, so good. Then, a couple days later I receive two emails from the company. Both started off with the obligatory Thank you for your interest in employment with our company. Then the first one continued with (and I'm paraphrasing) At this time we have decided to not move forward with your application.

The second email, time-stamped 2 seconds after the first one, said, We regret to inform you that this position has been canceled.

Confused much?

If you're that disorganized of a company then I'm happy to not work for you. And I thank you for saving me the trouble of smacking the shit out of you at a later date with the company stapler.

I briefly thought about sending my own two emails. One saying that I have decided not to move forward with my application for your position and the other saying that my interest in your company has been canceled. But most businesses these days send their generic emails from a NoReply email address so there went that idea.

In the meantime, still searching for my dream job as Movie Quote Extraordinaire with unlimited pizza eating perks. 

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Here's what's happening

Hello Blog World!

I apologize in advance that this post will be a mash up of different things and not just focused on one topic. Consider it a bit like a convo with an old friend where you catch up on what's happening in one another's lives.

So today is April 1st, April Fool's Day or actually it was because now it's about 9:30 pm and many (a few?) of you will be reading this on April 2. I really didn't think this one through or else I'd have written and posted this in a more timely fashion. Okay, so April Fool's Day. A day for pranks and laughs but it means a bit more to me because 20 years ago today Bill asked me to marry him. I know, talk about timing. This says a lot about our relationship. Of course when I mentioned this to him he looked at me with that vacant I-have-no-idea-but-I'll-take-your-word-for-it look. What can I say? I may not remember what I had for breakfast yesterday, or if I even ate breakfast but I can remember certain dates with startling accuracy.

In other news I'm sad to say that my anxiety and panic attacks have resurfaced with a vengeance. I'm so upset by this. A year and a half ago I was forced to go off my meds because of insurance issues and for that year and a half I was fine. I felt clearer and a tad more emotional but best of all I had no attacks. I thought I finally had this thing beaten. What crap. About a couple of months ago I started experiencing those bad feelings. Then this past Saturday night I was out and a full blown panic attack came on. It really sucked. I saw my doctor and I'll be starting meds this week. This in itself makes me anxious what with the waiting to see what side effects there are and how my body reacts. Blech.

Okay let's talk about some fun stuff. Today in Pop Culture history:

1963 - ABC premiered General Hospital. I was a big fan of this show back in the 80's and early 90's when John Stamos and Rick Springfield were on.

1979 - Nickelodeon was launched. I remember watching You Can't Do That On Television. Today my son watches Spongebob.

Wow, a lot has changed. And yet, much has stayed the same. So what's been going on with you?