Saturday, September 22, 2012

The zombie finger

I might have ring strangulation. I've thought this for a while but have been too skeered to do something about it.

You see, my wedding band always fit just right, which I thought was perfect so I wouldn't have to worry about it getting loose due to finger shrinkage from cold weather and falling off. When we bought our wedding rings I put this one on and said, "Yep this is it." It's nothing fancy. Just a plain gold band but it means the world to me. We had been to many jewelry stores seeking rings that were "us" and in the end simple won out.

Fast forward seven years later and I'm pregnant. Yes, you guessed it. When everything else started to swell up like my ankles, my boobs and my stomach, my fingers were included. Since then I haven't been able to remove it. It won't budge past the first knuckle.

My mom said, "Oh that's normal. Look at mine, I haven't been able to take my ring off for years." So you're saying that this round indentation that my ring leaves is perfectly fine, Mom? I can slide my ring back a little and that's when I see the mark left behind. My finger doesn't turn blue or purple (except when I'm coloring with Little Man and we use markers) so that's a good thing.

My only concern is, exactly how would they go about removing my ring from my finger without causing injury to my finger? And what about the ring itself? Would they have to cut it? And would that be considered a bad omen? And just who is "they" anyway? Do I go to a jeweler? A doctor? Is there a ring removal specialist?

Maybe I'll just let it be. Until my finger swells up and turns a sickly green. Then I can run around screaming, "I have a zombie finger!" and freak people out. Do I know how to turn a bad situation into something cool, or what?

This seems a bit extreme for removing a ring, no?


  1. They have to cut it off if it gets like that and you want to remove it. My grandmother had to get them to do it with her engagement ring.

    1. Cut it off??! But I'm rather attached to my finger. :D