I was cutting a pill in half on my nightstand one evening and one half stayed on the table and the other flew into my open drawer.
And why was the drawer open?
Because that's where I keep the knife.
And why do I keep a knife in my night table drawer?
Well, first of all, it's only a butter knife. I just thought I would clarify that before anyone thought otherwise and started watching the evening news for reports about a homicidal blogger. And no, I don't get cravings for buttered toast in the middle of the night. But I needed it for a similar reason when I was going off some meds a while back and had to start taking half doses. I just never returned it to the kitchen cutlery drawer. I'm lazy like that. And also forgetful, which explains that Payless coupon I came across from 2007. Besides one never knows when one might need a knife. They come in quite handy when you need a screwdriver but don't have one around.
So anyway, while searching for that half piece among all my jewelry, assorted papers, and other knick-knacks (hello Batman action figure), I found several loose teeth. I know, disturbing. Each time I saw a small piece of white I fished it out only to find it was a tooth.
At first there was disappointment. Where the hell is that damn pill half? Then, confusion. Why are there loose teeth in here?
Weird. This whole post is weird.
Anyway, I'm pretty sure the teeth belonged to Chris and fell out of a tissue they were in.
Why are his teeth in a tissue in my drawer?
Because I keep all the baby teeth he's lost. I'm oddly sentimental like that. Maybe I'm just plain odd. The husband says that's not only an obvious statement but an understatement.
In case you're wondering, I did finally find that stupid pill half. I now cut my pills with the drawer closed. The knife still remains in the drawer. The teeth are all in an enclosed zip-lock baggie. I cannot promise that this will be the last weird post.