Wednesday, August 22, 2012

To wear or not to wear: Part 2

This past Monday and Tuesday we took Chris to some area pools for some swimming fun before school starts again.

Monday we were at Red Rock and Tuesday we were at a local aquatic center. In between swimming and relaxing and just generally having fun I spent some time gawking at what other people wore. Do people seriously look in the mirror and think, "Yeah, I look goooood."?

This prompted me to make another list of acceptable/unacceptable clothing to wear while swimming at the local pool.

Men should wear swim trunks. Period. End of story. Knee length speedos are not attractive. Ever. Neither are short shorts that look as if the man borrowed his wife's bathing suit bottoms. We are not in the South of France, people! I do not want to see all your junk wrapped up tightly in a pair of inappropriate swim whatevers. Invest in board shorts like a normal guy!

Along those same lines I must ask this: Guys, young and older, why do you wear basketball shorts and underwear to go swimming? What is that all about? Doesn't that feel uncomfortable? Like you couldn't quite make it to the urinal in time?

It's bad enough I have to see them walking around on dry land with their pants down to their ankles, advertising to the world what underwear they are wearing. But really, at the pool, too? This isn't your own backyard pool or the local swimming hole in the woods. You're in public! Proper swim trunks are warranted.

Lastly, to the very pregnant woman who was there with her 6 kids (one of whom was wearing basketball shorts and underwear) please note that a bra is a bra and a bikini top is a bikini top. They may look similar and act similar but they are indeed very different. One you wear in private, under your clothes and one you can wear in public. Obviously you got confused about which is which.


  1. She took six kids to a public pool while she was heavily pregnant? Holy crap, I'm amazed she had the energy and forethought to wear the bra at all!

    1. You're right. I guess I should be grateful for this.