I think I should clean up my act

The other day I cursed. Out loud. In front of my kid. I know, bad. Very, very bad. My kid called me on it and said, "Mom! Stop swearing!"

(I only felt bad for doing it in front of him and not for actually swearing. Swearing is an alternative to killing people, and keeps me out of jail so it's the lesser of two evils.)


So, feeling remorseful, (not really) I apologized to him.

"I'm sorry Little Man. Mommy wouldn't swear so much if people just stopped acting like assholes."

This made him laugh. "You said 'ass,'" he said. That word always makes him laugh, though I'm not sure why. Maybe because ass-->fart/poop. And of course boys and men love bathroom humor.


Now, before your eyes bug out and you go write me a hate comment please know that I do not make it a habit to swear often in front of my child. Except for the occasional 'damn' or 'shit'. I don't consider 'crap' a bad word. 'Frig(gin)' is borderline. Yeah, okay so I have a potty mouth. But I always apologize if he's around and tell him swearing is a bad thing and not to do it, which makes me feel a bit better as a mom but somewhat hypocritical. Thankfully he doesn't question the logic. Yet.